The Nichten Lichten Story - Retold through the Madman's Eyes

Well, this took a lot longer than even I expected.
Let us hope that my posts also do not get the same frequency as today, 29th Feb.

Thankfully, I have notes on what I wanted to write about before being consumed by the maddening student life of RWTH. And no. I will not bitch about the RWTH right now. Depending on how things go, I might do it later, or very VERY later.

Rather than that, for a change, I would like to dwell on the past, which is ironic because usually, I want to move on from the past and look at new up-and-coming things. More precisely, I would like to continue where I left off in the last post.

First things first, for the non-existent person waiting for the details of the braiding robot project that I was involved in for almost 4 years, I have news for you.

My aim was to do it as my thesis, but because of reasons including not making enough sacrifices to the education Gods, I could not. That means instead of a full Master's thesis, It had to be shrunk down to a "Projectarbeit" or just a lowly project work. I don't really care about the title because I have the work to back it up. And you can read my work, and the larger thesis based on which my boss got his PhD. Please find the links below.

Full Dissertation (German) - https://www.ita.rwth-aachen.de/go/id/jfbg/file/954427

My "Mini" Report -https://drive.google.com/file/d/1IlPpMcq-Qxiyesh8SEHH_oU76PogXU7U/view?usp=sharing

Mini Report Presentation -  https://docs.google.com/presentation/d/1qT2qesopK0X_ddCNxku1Ip33Es_It6Qb/edit?usp=sharing&ouid=113655213584241768903&rtpof=true&sd=true

And if you are gonna comment on what I did, I expect you to be either accurate concerning the content of the comment, or be inspired by the immortal "Fakk Yuu" and try to exceed the limits of foolishness whilst providing me more content. Danke.


In the words of Jeremy Clarkson, "Moving on..."

Since I left my last post on the visit to India, I will pick it up again, which is also interesting because another visit to India is planned soon (Hopefully I post this post before).

I arrive, as usual, in New Delhi after an 8-hour flight from Paris. Yes, Paris, because for some reason flights from 300km farther away were cheaper INCLUDING the 300km travel with the Thalys and a hotel booking. Interesting.

Unlike last time, I was able to get WiFi access without needing a SIM card, but I did need to scan my passport for an OTP printout. This is interesting for a lot of reasons, not the least of which is DigiYatra, but let's leave that for now too.

As soon as I got out of the IGI T3 tho, it was basically exactly like it has been. Warm, sooty, with a layer of something that I can't quite put my finger on. I make my way to the Metro, and around 40 minutes later, I am at the NDLS railway station. Honestly, as someone who has a habitual complaining disorder, can't complain too much about the Airport Metro. 

Last time, in 2021, there was an AeroBridge under construction so that commuters from the airport line who want to get to the railway station do not have to cross the road with their heavy luggage. This time, in 2022, it was open, and it already looked 5-7 years old, with the occasional splashes of gutka and other stuff spewed out on literally every support pillar. I wonder if construction companies in India do accelerated wear and corrosion tests including gutka and paan as test reagents.

Aerobridge in Question 

Views from the Aerobridge

Views OF the Aerobridge

Frankly looks not too bad, but this is the "other side" of the railway station

I don't really notice any big differences in station cleanliness or infrastructure, apart from the fact that the graffiti that was painted on 3-4 years ago is now all flaked off because of no maintenance, and the tracks when leaving Delhi to the north side are still littered with as much plastic as I remember. As I find my spot and a helpful dude helps me get my luggage on top, I recline and relax on my chair. There are 4 ways to get from Delhi to Chandigarh, and I would always prefer the train. I personally have had no experience with the new Vande Bharat train sets, but my sister has, and they seem to be an improvement over the standard trains, and the fares are also not that different. (I think). Still good for the Indian Railways on getting new trains. In my last to last post, I wished Air India would buy new widebodies. In my last post, that was true. Here, I wish that IR speeds up its track ratings and deploys new trains for more comfort. Also should point out the excellent DFC or the Dedicated Freight Corridor of the railways. 

Trains are trains, and I like trains.
Edit - I did not notice the wrong type of floor tiles here. You will see what I mean
The fact that these are on the platform for the trains makes it so much more sad

If this kind of image of India is something you want people to ignore, it is not going to be easy, because this is basically the norm rather than the exception

After a rather uneventful journey apart from the slightly weird bit where one of the train attendants sat next to me while video calling who I assume was his girlfriend for over 30 minutes, I was in Chandigarh. 

The only change I noticed in Chandigarh was HOLY COW the amount of cars and traffic Chandigarh has now. PS - I mentioned holy cow so no fanboys of a particular political party, please. One "fakk yuu" is enough. Chandigarh, as you may know, was envisioned as a city designed for a population of approximately 500,000 people. This plan was formulated in the early 1950s by the renowned French architect Le Corbusier. The current population of just Chandigarh, which is not including the satellite developments around it, is over 1,050,000.

And if you include the estimates for these extended areas, from where people travel and cross through or to Chandigarh daily, the combined population is now touching the 2 million mark. A city designed for 500,000 people is dealing with 2,000,000 people and does not have a freaking subway or a metro or my favorite, a tram. 

As a reference to my international readers, all area outside of the symmetric light grey boxes in the map was developed AFTER 2000. 
Yet, no thought was given to public transport at all until last year.

A proposal for a Metro was there back in the early 1990s but it was deemed "too expensive".
Now, after almost 30 years, the project has been approved. I wonder if it had been cheaper more ecological and less destructive to have the public transport system planned before the area around the city expanded? Kind of like Paris and the RER A, you know, with the whole Le Corbusier connection and all? I still would prefer trams tho, and Chandigarh I feel is uniquely suited perfectly to having trams.

But what can I really expect when the elections for the Mayor of the city are rigged so that a person who could not pass the 8th class of school and has liquor stores around the city can become the mayor of the city with the highest per capita income and highest literacy rate?

The candidate who was forcibly made the winner

If it is too crazy for you to believe, it is also crazy for the Supreme Court of India, so now, we will have a Mayor who has a BA from IGNOU and owns a tent business.

As the supreme leader likes to say, "Mera desh badal raha hai, aage badh raha hai"

I digressed, as usual. I mean, I don't like it, but I'll have to go along with it. 
Or in the words of the great philosopher Peter O'Hanraha-hanrahan...

Ich Nichten Lichten.

I think James May summed it up the best at the end of his "Our Man In..." travel series in India. I am still not happy that we only got 3 episodes, but... Peter?

Please don't come here and fret about India's problems because the truth is they're exactly the same problems as we have at home. They're just magnified here by the sheer size of the place and the number of people. When you are visiting India, take a really deep breath and allow India to beat you up. You'll enjoy it and it'll do your good and don't for a moment try fighting back because as one of the crew said India will always win.

 

Although I am an Indian, I have lived outside of India for long enough that I can somehow consider going to India as tourists would from the Western economies. 

Of course, I still am an Indian deep down, down to my cheapskate nature. And I very much enjoy the contradictions and the way things happen in India. No one is perfect here, but at least we are entertained, as long as it is not happening to us. I will let the pictures do the talking.

And of course, no country or culture (that I am aware of) can come close to the sheer variety of food. That is always critical for me. German Cuisine? Nein danke.

Home cooked food cannot be beat.

It can get close tho.

Typical Chandigarh

I would quickly like to point out that I do not usually wander about in India with my camera stuff, mostly because of safety reasons and also because I am rarely sightseeing and almost always out because of a thing I need to do. I will try to take more pictures this time around.

A concept that is being reinvented by technology. Fresh foods are being delivered to your doorstep. HelloFresh since time eternal.

Every single box you see here is sweets.

My favorite place to get a milkshake

Look closely for Irony

The Tibetan refugee winter market. The amount of clothes on sale here is frankly disturbing.

Corporate Overlords Offices

Chandigarh Back Alleys

Chandigarh and the Tricity Region have some wonderful parks, but even that is getting messed up by the local government.

I do not think it works

This visit also allowed me to finally FINALLY replace my trusty old Lenovo Y50-70. It is still functional and is and has been a great laptop, especially after I switched the HDD with the SSD. But a laptop I got in 2015, no matter how cutting edge, is gonna show its age in 2022. And with the 32 Mpix images from the 90D, it was really struggling. Since my experience with the Y50 was great, I decided to stick with Lenovo and go for the Legion 5 Pro. For reasons I will not go into, I got my laptop, Made in China, Sold in the US, delivered in India, to be taken back to Germany. And it was the cheapest way to get it. Globalization. I also thankfully got the "old" Ryzen 5000 series with RTX 3070, which meant cheaper DDR4 RAM and PCIe Gen 3 SSD upgrades. Coupled with the new AI features of Lightroom that take advantage of the Tensor cores and the 8GB GPU VRAM, this laptop should work out great in the long run as well. My only nitpick would be the plastic body instead of a metallic palm rest. There is a spot now where my palm rests (Palmrest... Get it?) within less than a year of using it. WHY? WHY? I don't like it. But I'll have to go along with it... 

ICH NICHTEN LICHTEN x2

Sorry, and if you do not get the reference, Peter, next time you are crossing the road, don't bother looking.


Moving on yet again, Since I had my drone with me, I thought, yeah, maybe I should take that thing, fly it around in Chandigarh as well, and get some nice shots?
I made a mistake. For some reason, the DJI software detected that I was in India, and automatically locked the max height to 15 meters. 15 METERS!
This is why I hate closed-source software and subscription services and the idea that I don't own a thing. I paid for my drone. The drone is legally allowed to fly to 120m. That was already notified. I am a trained drone pilot for my drone class. YET, I was not able to use a thing that I had BOUGHT, NOT RENTED, in the way I wanted to use it. And the best/worst part was that I pointed out this EXACT thing in my last post about the software being closed off and obfuscated. Apparently, this is no longer an issue, especially with newer models, but still. Unacceptable. And since DJI still pretty much owns the hobby drone market, I have no option but to agree with their terms... I don't like it. But I'll have to go along with it... 

ICH NICHTEN LICHTEN  x3

I managed to find a highrise in one of the suburbs of Chandigarh and took my drone there for a flight. It is a good thing that the height was limited because as soon as I took off, the drone caught the attention of pigeons and eagles and they almost attacked the drone. Thankfully, I managed to bring it back down safely. So, you can now also enjoy some views of the absolute dystopian north Indian suburbs from a bird's point of view. American concepts really did a number on the European French planning, didn't they?

If you thought American and Arab suburban areas were bad... I have something for you

The drone also caused a problem on my way back because according to the IGI baggage laws, Batteries are not allowed in checked-in luggage. I flew with the drone and the remote in the checked-in bag from Paris and it was no problem. But they flagged my luggage in Dehli and I was forced to open the bag and remove the drone battery from the drone. When I asked if I should also remove the remote, which has the same type of battery in it too... They said no, you can leave it. Oh, and dry coconuts are not allowed in checked-in baggage too, because apparently the oils are not good for the airframe. This was told to me by the security guy who was rearranging my 1 kg of Ghee (Clarified Butter) back in the bag.

(I will save the tagline from overuse)

But now for the meat of the story. We were supposed to travel to Delhi for our return flights. And because my parents also travel, we usually decide to get a cab. As luck would have it, we ended up with a cab driver who, honestly, blew everyone's minds right off. Sit back and enjoy. (Photos are unrelated)

I don't exactly remember how we got hold of this guy. Our standard cab driver option was unavailable and since we prefer to stick to the tried and tested, we got the contact info for this dude as a reference.

The first good sign for us was that he was on time. For Indians, this is highly unusual, as they are at least 5-10 minutes late, with some also being over 30 minutes late. For the uninitiated, anything over 2 minutes without informing us of the delay is late. No excuses. You are wasting not only your time, you are wasting mine too. 

No wonder it is still under construction

I think by the time the Institute is finished, The concept it was being built for will also be finished

The next good sign was that the cab was clean and maintained, and he seemed fairly helpful with our luggage. As with any taxi trip, my dad likes to talk to the drivers, figure out what's happening, and in the worst case, keep talking to keep him awake. Yes, that also has happened at least twice when our driver, after doing multiple trips without a break was just momentarily falling asleep at the wheel. 

Maybe 45 minutes have passed and he starts telling the story of how local / district-level elections are faked and regulations are thrown out for a toss. Obviously, this is now very faded in my memory but I can recall that he was telling us about how there is a restriction on canvassing for the elections shortly before the elections themselves, and as member of the election commission volunteers, they usually get reports from competing parties about the fluting of norms by their competitors. By law, they have to go to the site where canvassing for the elections is still taking place, and video record the area to submit as proof that there is no canvasing happening. The reality however is that the political parties gift alcohol and other stuff to the volunteers and also an unabashed yet cloaked show of force that makes the volunteers comply with their demands instead of the other way around. He mentioned how the video proof to be recorded is then directed by the political party candidates themselves so that they can strategically place all the promotional banned election material out of the frame of the camera. This the driver mentioned happening 10-15 years ago, so surely this must have stopped by now. Definitely.

New Delhi, and yes, this is the NEW part

Poster wishing a local politician a happy birthday, which is also decorated with the same toppings you saw on the Aerobridge, fresh from the mouth.

Then we turned on how he became a taxi driver. As with many other people, it was a mix of bad luck and bad decisions. Also getting to know the fact that our driver who is ferrying us started driving state buses when he was 12-13 years old for fun because he liked buses was both terrifying and relaxing at the same time. I must say tho that his driving was very safe and relaxed, and I never felt like I would die. This is probably the highest praise I can give to a driver driving in India.

From here, the story went on to how he also worked in other countries, mostly Arab nations, but never was satisfied with the lifestyle there. I'm not surprised. But it was nice to know that we were not dealing with just any other guy. He was the kind of guy who knew things. Including things that would make news almost 1 year later.

He somehow knew all about how illegal migration is happening from Punjab specifically and the ways and routes people use to get to Canada and the US. The oldest way used to be people would get hired as actors for Punjabi films and Music videos to be shot in London or the UK in general. Once in the UK, because you have a UK visa, you can apparently get to Mexico. Once you are in Mexico, you know what happens next. Murica! Apparently, this whole system is planned to the last detail, including contacts in the UK, Mexico, US Border Patrol, and Immigration Lawyers in the US as well. They all get paid a cut of the smuggling fee. The standard approach used to be that the people were left at the border and had to make a run. Since the US then at some point issued shooting orders, the approach changed to waiting at the border until you get the confirmation that the contact on the US side is in place, and then just getting arrested by the USB Patrol. Once arrested, you ask for a lawyer and that would be your contact and your entry ticket into the US. The going rate for this whole ordeal used to be around 45,000 Euros. 45k Euros to jump countries and get arrested. I'm not qualified enough to blame this on anything or anyone. But it is just sad that such large amounts of money are exchanged just for people to leave India. Of course, the movie "Dunki" came out, and this has gathered much attention, along with the halt of a Nicaraguan flight in France carrying 300 Indians.

This is probably the photo(s) that captures the essence of India
For those who don't know, allow me to explain

These tiles are there for visually impaired people to make it easier when they use a walking stick.
The dot type represents a crossing section
The line type is for going straight

The government issues money to "make footpaths accessible"
Footpaths are already raised almost 1 foot over roads and are basically covered drain systems on the roadsides, as you can see. Even I struggle to climb up.

Destroy perfectly fine footpath tiles to place special tiles

USE ONLY CROSSING TYPE TILES

FAIL TO REMOVE OPEN DRAIN PITS

FAIL TO MAKE THE FOOTPATH SMOOTH

Get paid, earn money, and find a new job to mess up.
Rinse and Repeat

And for his pièce de résistance, The taxi driver, who did not finish high school, had set up multiple bank accounts, got himself great credit scores thus making him eligible for platinum cards and rewards programs, had his own website for booking his services, and was running TARGETED ads for customers who frequently like to travel to the airport. He showed us how Adsense worked, and how SEO was useful for him so that he could add keywords to his website so that when people from Canada, the US, the EU, or Australia look for cab services from IGI Delhi to Punjab, his website comes on top via google AdWords, how there was a fight between fellow cab drivers just to get hold of the AdWords keyword list that bumps up the websites on google search. How he uses Google's Adwords to recommend his website to travelers from the countries HE shortlisted his website should be shown to, How he balances the cost of ads between how much it costs him to show his ads on Google vs how much he earns from such a ride. How he had calculated a 35 rupees per click cost that was optimal for him at that time. How he found out that instead of using online hosting for his website, he could set up his own website and server using WordPress. How he enables ads in more countries during peak travel times and disables them during peak hours to save on ad costs. How his AdWords listing on Google had got him 400+ clicks the previous day and how it gets an average of 250 clicks on travel season. 

All these things that he was doing, without any formal education, will cost you a fortune to just know about in a formal seminar by one of those fancy consulting companies. Even universities and business schools would not be able to give such a good explanation and understanding of how he was running a seemingly successful cab business. It was glorious. His knowledge and experience in this particular domain were nothing short of amazing and reinforced my belief that the only way to really learn and understand something is to do it yourself. Everything he needed to know in theory was available on the internet freely, and he watched YouTube videos on all these things during the COVID lockdowns. The edge that he has comes from actually doing those things as well. 

An upcoming shopping center named Walk, which I can bet will have no public transport or easy walking access and would be car-centric.

Because "School" is no longer classy enough

Honestly, hats off to the guy. In a world of easy and cheap internet access, where you can easily be like Fakk Yuu, choose to be Multani Travel of Jalandhar.

I would make an effort to hire him as frequently as possible. That is how you get yourself a loyal customer.

Now that I have caught up to last year, I should stop this post as well. Because hell will freeze over if I ever end up catching the reality timeline on this blog. Of course, I hope you enjoyed reading the thoughts in the depths of my brain. Most people will be confused because I am somehow capable of thinking of more than 120 or 240 words at a time and that is a skill not commonly found nowadays. I will skip the RWTH complaint section for now because you can bet your bottom dollar that a big post will be made on that topic alone soon. And since I mentioned that consistency is key in light entertainment in my last post, which feels like it was both 1 month and 10 years ago, I would like to end again with songs and movie suggestions. And of course, as usual, the title has a hint for the songs. Because it has been too long, I would give out 2 suggestions. The first one being Nate Smith's live performance at Berklee sponsored by Zildjian. There are 4 parts of the performance on YouTube, but my favorite has to be part 2 where "Retold" is being performed. The second recommendation would be from DMB's Madman's Eyes, which is part of the "Walk Around the Moon" album, the first ever DMB album NOT to debut at number 1 on Billboard 200. That does not mean it is not good tho.

For the movie recommendation, I would go for the obvious choices of Oppenheimer or Top Gun Maverick. I don't really need to explain myself for any of these choices.

As always, questions and comments are always welcome. I hope you learned something and it was not an absolute waste of time for you. I tried to include more links for stuff I mentioned in the post this time. Appreciate the extra effort, bitte.


Toodles!